Inseminoid (1981)

aka "Horror Planet" USA

Directed by Norman J. Warren
Written by Nick and Gloria Maley

Rated R for sexual violence, nudity and gore.

"Inseminoid" is one of four films I recently purchased in a 4-Film British Horror Pack. Other films in the set are: "Curse of the Voodoo", "Horror Hospital" and "Tower of Evil" (click links for reviews).

"Inseminoid" is one of many sci-fi films from the early 80's to attempt to cash in on the success of Ridley Scott's "Alien". While it doesn't have the awesome sets, the amazing acting, or the iconic xenomorph alien of "Alien", "Inseminoid" manages to be surprisingly entertaining considering the film's obviously low budget. It is hard not to laugh at parts of this film, but it also has moments of genuine horror.

After some groovy, retro, spaced-out opening credits, a female narrator informs us that a ship has been exploring a planet that was once inhabited, but has since been abandoned. Some might criticize a film for using voice-over narration so heavy-handedly, but in all fairness it's less cheesy than the opening rolling text narration of the "Star Wars" films or the dense, confusing voice-over narration in "Dune". We then see two men in spacesuits exploring the planet. They stumble on a series of caves and split up to investigate (always a bad idea in this type of movie). One of the explorers discovers a pile of crystals which he examines. By the time his teammate returns, the first man has been rendered unconscious by the crystals, which have eroded through his glove and skin and infected his bloodstream. The infected team member is brought back inside the atmosphere-controlled headquarters of the crew, where we meet about a dozen crew members who we will later see killed in bizarre and extraordinary ways.

The crew tries to go about their work in spite of the accident, but Ricky, the infected man, begins to behave violently. He dons a spacesuit and goes back out into the planet's caves, apparently being controlled by the alien crystals, and attacks anyone who tries to stop him. He leaves one half of the air-lock open so that the other team members can't follow him. Ricky pushes rudely past another crew member exploring the caves, and the woman (I think the character's name is Gail) stumbles and gets her foot caught in some kind of metal debris. Now what happens next was like a precursor to the "Saw" films. Gail's suit's heating unit goes out abruptly, leaving her with no protection against the -80 degree F alien planet temperature. A male teammate tries to talk her through the repair of the unit by radio (which is apparently as easy as crossing a few wires), but Gail just panics and is completely useless. As a last resort, Gail opens her face-mask (!?!?) and puts one of the air-tubes from her suit directly in her mouth. She then whips out a hedge trimmer and tries to cut off her caught foot. Sadly, Gail's incompetence proves deadly to her. While completely absurd, this is one of the more interesting death scenes in the film.

 

"Gail. You've spent your whole life relying on the men around you to fix things. Now, in order to survive, you're going to have to help yourself. Your foot is trapped in some scrap metal. Your thermal unit is broken. You have three minutes to free yourself and get to the airlock before you freeze to death. Do you have enough of a grasp of basic electronics to cross the wires that will return power to your thermal unit, or will you cut off your leg with a hedge trimmer? The decision is yours."

Kate, another crew member, is now trapped alone (unless you count Gail's body) in the caves with infected Ricky. He tries to stop her from closing the airlock, so she shoots him, killing him instantly. She actually catches some flak from her teammates for not trying to find a non-fatal way to stop Ricky, which just goes to show you can't make everyone happy. Luckily for the crew, the mayhem appears to have subsided... for now... In spite of the team's incredibly low survival rate in the caves, two more team members are dispatched to continue explorations. This time, perky young Sandy (Judy Geeson) is paired with the only black guy in space, who is promptly torn to pieces in front of her by an unseen assailant. Sandy passes out only to awaken on some kind of laboratory table, stripped completely naked.

While lying prone and helpless, Sandy is given an injection by the ship's doctor, whose presence in this strange alien lab is a bit of a mystery. The best interpretation I've found is that he is actually trying to get one of the crew members pregnant with an alien baby as part of a dark conspiracy to bring alien subjects back in utero to the company they all work for. There isn't much evidence for this theory outside of this scene, but something similar happened in "Alien", so I assume the writers were thinking along these lines.

The following scene is the one for which this film has gained the most fame and notoriety. The "Inseminoid" alien finally makes an appearance. He is a comically grotesque, penis-shaped lobster-man who pops up between Sandy's open legs as if to say "Daddy's home and it's time for love!"

Big Papa Lobster wastes no time with foreplay. He slides what appears to be a monstrous turkey baster filled with creepy eggs and green liquid into Sandy and begins to pump his love-beasts into her womb. This tube scene is one of the best scenes in the movie for raw, visceral creepiness. It is also the scene which has inspired the most controversy.

When Sandy wakes up again, she's back in her team's base with the doctor and her other worried crewmates. Apparently she's two months pregnant, which is impossible as she'd been taking regular birth control injections. I guess human birth control can't hold back the virulent Lobsterman seed. As she gets more and more pregnant (which happens at an alarming rate), she becomes possessed by her alien spawn and begins killing and feeding on her teammates.

Up until her character's alien insemination, Judy Geeson hadn't had much opportunity to really act. While I wouldn't rate her among the best actresses ever, Geeson's performance in the second half of "Inseminoid" is really what carries the movie. Her intensity and craziness reach a fevered pitch quickly and keep building from there. One of her team members remarks "Well, that'll look good on the report: the team were terrorized by an expectant mother." It's a lot scarier than it sounds. The surviving crew members dwindle as Sandy strikes again and again, mercilessly slaughtering her friends and coworkers. In the end, she is finally strangled to death by her boyfriend Mark, but not before giving birth to TWINS!

I give "Inseminoid" a 9/10. It is quite possibly the most entertaining "Alien" rip-off ever made. It is serious enough to be genuinely thrilling, and contains images that are pure sci-fi gold. "Inseminoid" may even have surpassed "Alien" in terms of pacing. I dearly love Ridley Scott's original sci-fi masterpiece, but it sure did move along slowly. I cannot recommend "Inseminoid" if you are an expecting mother, uncomfortable with depictions of alien insemination or dislike cheesy b-horror films. If you enjoy bizarre, obscure b-movies, track down a copy of "Inseminoid" ASAP.













I also recommend:

Tower of Evil (1972)

Directed by Jim O'Connolly
Written by George Baxt and Jim O'Connolly

Rated R for bloody violence and lots of nudity.

"Tower of Evil" is part of a British Horror 4-Film Box Set I recently purchased. Other films in the set include "Curse of the Voodoo", "Horror Hospital", and "Inseminoid" (review still to come).

I've read a few other reviews of "Tower of Evil" while looking for good screenshots, and found a wide divergence of reactions to the film. People either love it or hate it. I fell somewhere in between. I feel like there are some promising elements in "Tower of Evil" that were never fully fleshed out. Perhaps it's due for a re-make?

"Tower of Evil" is what John Carpenter's "The Fog" would have been if it had been made by pervy British hippies on a shoestring budget. During the opening credits, the "helicopter shot" of a lighthouse is clearly just a camera tracking around a shoddily-constructed model of a lighthouse. I'm not against using models, but if you're going to try and con a theater-full of people into believing your model is a real building, it had better be a damned good model.

Through the fog, we see two fishermen sailing towards the lighthouse. They have a brief, cryptic conversation about how they need to do something about the island, and it's long overdue. Upon arriving, they are shocked to find a nude male body lying facedown in a puddle being fed on by carrion crab. They proceed to the main building and discover a man in a butterfly shirt impaled on the wall with a large, golden scepter of some sort. You may recognize this actor (Robin Askwith) as Jason Jones from "Horror Hospital".

As they proceed through the building, the fishermen find a naked woman, with her hair covering her face, lying dead on the floor. They try to brush the hair out of her face, but her head falls off entirely and rolls down the stairs. The older of the two fishermen opens a closet to discover a nude, crazy girl (Candace Glendenning) who promptly stabs him with a sharp stick, killing him. She runs naked in the fog for a bit and then gets conked on the head by the other fisherman.

The police bring the crazy naked lady to the mainland for questioning, a task which is made more difficult by the fact that she's slipped into some kind of catatonia. Luckily, Dr. Simpson has a psychedelic seizure-inducing light show that reputedly reactivates dormant minds long enough to ask them a few questions. While psychology in film is seldom very true to life, this arrangement is particularly unbelievable. I'm guessing that a significant portion of the budget for this film was spent on hallucinogens. "A bank of colored lights that flashes in pretty patterns? Groovy! That sounds pretty scientific to me!"

The treatment miraculously works, triggering a series of disconnected memories from the girl, whose name we discover is Penny Read. Her flashbacks reveal that she had been on the island with her boyfriend and two other hippie teens. Penny's female friend has bad vibes about the island, but the others ignore her. They smoke grass and walk around naked in true "free love" spirit until they are killed off one by one by a man with long fingernails who appears to be smeared with his own excrement. At this point, Penny begins to have some kind of seizure and they have to turn Dr. Simpson's Funkadelic Groove Machine off for a while to let her rest.

Meanwhile, an expedition to the island has been mounted by some archeological folks who are looking for a hidden Phoenecian treasure trove. They believe the golden scepter that they found is one of many treasures buried in a tomb somewhere on the island. A private detective, Evan Brent (played by Bryant Haliday of "Curse of the Voodoo" and "Devil Doll") accompanies them to find out who was responsible for the killings. 

Bryant Haliday as "The Great Vorelli" in "Devil Doll" (1964).

Now Bryant is normally a pretty good b-movie actor. The previous movies I'd seen of his were both black and white, and I was saddened to see that he didn't transition to color very gracefully. His face, which is pock-marked and blotchy, looked great in black and white. In color, Haliday looks like an overcooked sausage. His role in this movie is too small to really offer much opportunity to amaze us with his acting skills. For Haliday at his strongest and most intense, check out "Devil Doll".

 Evan Brent (Haliday) and Brom (Gary Hamilton) on the way to the island. 

The archeologists who accompany Brent to the island are the worst possible teammates for a dangerous expedition. They consist of two men and two women who have nearly all had romantic relationships or slept with one another. The bitterness between the four makes for funny dialogue, but they're ultimately pretty poor characters. On their way in, they remark that there are no gulls or birds of any kind on the island (a clever cover for the fact that most of the "island" footage is clearly shot in a studio, where there would be no birds).

The two ladyfolk archeologists are both shagadelic, and tease the boys mercilessly with their wiles. In the meantime, Evan Brent reveals that he believes there to be a system of caves underneath the island that are the probably resting spot of the treasure. The treasure is guarded by a statue of Baal, a god who the Phonecians worshipped with orgies and blood sacrifices. Unfortunately, Saul, the former lighthouse keeper, is also somewhere in the caves under the island. You see he's gone totally insane following the deaths of his wife and son, and now lives in squalor, attacking anyone who sets foot on the island. It is implied that Baal is somehow connected to Saul's craziness and the island's abnormally high fatality rate in general, but a clear connection is never drawn.

And so the stage is set for what can only be a very silly finale. I won't give away too much about the ending, but the film stays fairly true to the classic slasher film formula. What it lacks in coherence and quality writing, "Tower of Evil" makes up in bloody horror and gratuitous nudity.

I'd give "Tower of Evil" a 6/10, which I'm sure some would say is a generous rating. It's a film with a lot of great elements that was just put together in a less-than-ideal manner. The pacing, the acting and the low production value really robbed this movie of being what it could have been. There are some truly frightening images in the film (like a really creepy family portrait of Saul with his wife and baby) that periodically renew one's interest in the film interspersed with overlong scenes of badly written (and acted) dialogue. Overall, I'd steer clear if you're a casual horror fan, and check out the campy fun of "The Satanic Rites of Dracula" or "Horror Hospital" instead. If you're a brit-horror nut, it may be time to take your own trip to the "Tower of Evil".













I also recommend:

Horror Hospital (1973)

Directed by Antony Balch
Written by Antony Balch and Alan Watson

Rated R for violence and nudity.

"Horror Hospital" is part of a British Horror four movie box set I recently purchased. Other films in the set include "Curse of the Voodoo", "Inseminoid" and "Tower of Evil" (reviews still to come).

"Horror Hospital" stars Michael Gough as the demented Dr. Storm, who runs a health resort/hospital that "cures" its patients by lobotomizing them, turning them into brain-dead zombies. Gough is a veteran actor and has been in countless movies. Most notably, Gough was Bruce Wayne's butler Alfred in the Batman films of the 80's and 90's. While Gough's performance in "Horror Hospital" is nothing particularly special, it is interesting to see such a skilled actor in such a ridiculous b-movie.

The film opens with Dr. Storm sitting in an idling limousine with his midget servant, Frederick. As we watch, a young man and woman with bandaged, bleeding heads runs out of the woods. Dr. Storm guns the limo, pursuing them. On Dr. Storm's command, Frederick pulls a lever that causes a large blade to jut out of the side of the limo at neck-level, instantly decapitating the two escapees and catching their heads in a conveniently-placed canvas sack. That's right, folks; a decapitating limousine, the new standard of excellence for wealthy sociopaths.

Jump to London, where Jason Jones (Robin Askwith) sits dejectedly in a smokey night club. Jason looks like a mean, British, hippie version of Mark Hamill. He gets into a brief fistfight with a transvestite over a song that he says the tranny's band stole from him. When the tranny beats him (it's embarrassing to be overpowered by a man in a curly platinum wig and lipstick), Jason finds a group of his friends to comfort him. One of Jason's friends looks like an evil John Lennon. If you watch the film, you'll know who I mean. To make a long story short (too late for that) Jason's friends suggest he goes on a "hairy holiday" they see advertised through a travel agency. Jason agrees he needs some time away from the music scene, and embarks for a holiday in the British countryside.

On the train, Jason meets Judy (Vanessa Shaw), a quiet girl who he clumsily attempts to charm ("Don't worry. I'm not going to rape you."). Oddly enough, Jason's abrasive personality apparently rubs Judy the right way. Realizing they're going to the same place, they become travel companions.

When they arrive at Storm's hospital, they sit down to eat dinner with dozens of other young hippies who have already received the "Storm" treatment. They are pale, silent and expressionless, and each sports a fresh surgery scar on their left temple. Jason and Judy are immediately put off by the hospital and its catatonic patients, but Judy's creepy Aunt Harris (who is also Dr. Storm's assistant) tells them the hospital grounds are already closed for the evening and there's no way out. Jason and Judy decide to stay the night and make the best of it. In classic 70's horror movie style, making the best of it means having sex. Lots of sex. Afterwards, the pair decide to snoop around the hospital grounds a bit, and are horrified to discover that Dr. Storm is actually lobotomizing his patients to make them thoughtless drones.

As Jason and Judy struggle to find a way out of the hospital, bodies begin piling up. The travel agent who referred Jason to Dr. Storm wants more money for his services, so Storm has him decapitated. Aunt Judy tells Storm she won't help him with any more demented surgeries, and she gets attacked by a giant, melting flesh-monster. It seems anyone who crosses Storm comes to a bad end. He even has an army of ineffectual, unarmed guards in helmets who look like gay motorcycle enthusiasts. Dr. Storm's "Storm troopers" can't have been chosen for their strength, because they are constantly being overpowered by weak-looking hippie teens. Good thing they were wearing their helmets.

Jason and Judy are soon joined by Abraham (Kurt Christian), who is looking for his runaway girlfriend Millie. Unfortunately for Abraham, Millie has already received Dr. Storm's treatment, and is already a mindless slave. Terrified and desperate to escape, the three hippies make their way through Dr. Storm's hospital of horrors, discovering along the way the terrible secret behind Storm's psychotic surgeries

I give "Horror Hospital" a 7.5/10. I should say right up front that "Horror Hospital" is a terrible movie. If you're looking for a cinematic masterpiece, look elsewhere. Having said that, it's (perhaps unintentionally) one of the funniest horror movies I've ever seen. From the decapitation limo to Frederick the creepy midget, there's no lack of campy fun. There are also plenty of decent nude scenes (even some rare 70's male nudity) for discerning pervs and pervettes. While the story is patently ridiculous, there are actually some genuinely creepy images in this film, and the cinematography is at times surprisingly good. Watch this film with a six-pack of cheap beer and friends who appreciate low-brow humor.













I also recommend:

Devil Doll "Continental Version" (1964)

Directed by Lindsay Shonteff and Sidney J. Furie

Written by George Barclay, Lance Z. Hargreaves and Frederick E. Smith

"Devil Doll" is available to watch for free online here.

I reviewed a great b-horror film a few weeks ago called "Devil Doll". (Click here for review) I liked it so much, I have since bought "Devil Doll" on DVD, and was pleased to discover that the DVD came with both the UK version (which is the version available to watch for free online) and the "Continental Version", which had scenes changed and added for European audiences. 

Before I get in to the meat of my review of the "Continental Version", I would like to make a few observations that struck me while watching the film a second time. In my first review, I dismissed Bryant Haliday's performance of The Great Vorelli as "ridiculous as always... ...but slimy and creepy enough to evoke genuine discomfort." After a second viewing, my opinion of Haliday as an actor has gone up considerably. The dramatic tension he creates on stage could be cut with a knife. I particularly enjoyed the monologue during which he convinces an audience volunteer that they are about to be executed by soldiers. The overall eerie tone of the movie and the quality of the story and the acting are what separates this from the many other "killer doll" movies. It takes a b-movie premise and follows it through with thoughtful, serious conviction. 

The main difference between the "UK Version" and the "Continental Version" is that a scene of dialogue between Vorelli and his assistant (in the UK version) has been replaced with a scene of Vorelli hypnotizing a meek-looking woman into doing a wooden, creepy strip-tease for the audience (in the Continental version). As I remember from my viewing of the UK version, the omitted dialogue scene consists of Vorelli's assistant expressing jealousy of Mary-Anne, and Vorelli reassuring her, then sleeping with her, which is the lead-in to the later scene of her lying in bed, naked except for a sheet. While the dialogue scene isn't terribly crucial to plot development, I feel it gave Vorelli a bit more depth as a shameless womanizer. The strip-tease scene is a mixed bag. Vorelli compels a woman from the audience to do a strip-tease, but she does it like a robot, moving mechanically in a not-very-sexy manner. On the negative side, a scene that introduces nudity for nudity's sake to the movie was less arousing than watching modern shampoo commercials. The actress was sadly less attractive than Mary-Anne or Vorelli's assistant. It was also odd that under her professional businesswoman suit, the volunteer was wearing fancy lingerie. It's almost as if she was planning to do a strip-tease that night. Lastly, the woman's strip-tease is much more wooden and robotic than any of the people Vorelli had hypnotized earlier. If she had been as enthusiastic about the strip tease as Mary-Anne was about dancing, it might have been a good show. On the positive side, this scene adds an extra layer of creepy to the psycho-sexual vampire vibe that Vorelli has going. Because it's so un-sexy, watching the woman robotically strip for Vorelli becomes one of the film's eerier moments. It is rather uncomfortable to watch. 

The other two scenes are scenes that are in the UK version that have simply been re-shot with nudity added. These are my favorite new scenes. The first gives us an artful glimpse of one of Vorelli's assistant's breasts just before Hugo stabs her to death. A great breast and a great scene in general. The second occurs when Mark calls his friend in Berlin. In the original scene, it shows his friend in pajamas in a hotel room with a woman. The woman is clothed, but the scene suggests they're lovers. In the "Continental" version of the scene, she's topless for the whole telephone conversation. It's much more suggestive, and I thought made this scene funnier. Sorry for my pervy insights, but the male readers may want to know these things.

Overall, the movie worked about as well both ways. Purists will probably prefer the UK version, and pervy guys like me will make a v-line for the "Continental" version. Either way, "Devil Doll" is a great film, and is available to watch for free (UK version only) online here. If you would like to see the "Continental" version, it's available as a special feature with the DVD I bought:

Other haunted doll movies you may enjoy:

Devil Doll (1964)

Directed by Lindsay Shonteff and Sidney J. Furie
Written by George Barclay, Lance Z. Hargreaves and Frederick E. Smith

"Devil Doll" is available to watch for free online here.

"Devil Doll" is the second Lindsay Shonteff / Bryant Haliday collaboration I've watched recently (the first was "Curse of the Voodoo" (1965)). Like "Curse of the Voodoo", the name and the premise had me expecting the worst. While they are both pretty cheesy b-horror movies, both of these films exceeded my  expectations of them. "Devil Doll" in particular is one b-horror movie that deserves to be promoted to a B+.

[I have, since writing this review, bought "Devil Doll" on DVD, and have written a review of the "Continental" version of the film, which includes nudity, and is not available for free online. Read the review of the "Continental" version here.]

Bryant Haliday (who played Mike Stacey in Curse of the Voodoo) stars as The Great Vorelli, an evil hypnotist/ventriloquist who uses hypnosis to manipulate those around him. He headlines his own show with his "helper", Hugo the dummy. Hugo is no ordinary dummy though. He has special abilities that go beyond ventriloquism. While possessed dolls are nothing new to horror films, Hugo exhibits the same squeaky-voiced, knife-happy glee that would infuse the "Child's Play" franchise in the 80's and 90's.

William Sylvester stars as Mark English, a newspaper reporter who's been charged with reviewing the Great Vorelli's act. In an attempt to get close to Vorelli, English asks his girlfriend Marianne to volunteer as a hypnosis subject during a show. Vorelli hypnotizes Marianne and turns her into a rockin' dancer before a crowded theater full of spectators. Then, for the big finish, Vorelli brings out Hugo the dummy, who speaks fluently while Vorelli drinks from a glass of wine, then walks by himself to the front of the stage to accept the audience's applause. Marianne begins to sense something is wrong with Vorelli, but Mark keeps insisting that she get close to him for the purposes of his newspaper story. Unfortunately for the young lovers, Vorelli has developed his own plans for Marianne.

Yvonne Romain (who played Rosa the prostitute in "Corridors of Blood" (1958)) dazzles as vulnerable young Marianne. Her devotion to Mark English places her directly in Vorelli's slimy grasp. Romain's anti-chemistry with Haliday's Vorelli is potent. Like Dracula, Vorelli steals in in the dead of night to prey on pretty young women in a psycho-sexual manner. He mesmerizes them into a state of complete vulnerability and then takes advantage of them, infecting them further with his poisonous presence.

After Marianne's first visitation, she becomes ill and must be bedridden. She raves hysterically, but the doctors can't determine a medical reason for her illness. But Mark has received his own visitation that night from Hugo the dummy, who delivers a cryptic message: "Help me. Find me in Berlin, 1948." Further investigation reveals the key to the horrifying secret of the Great Vorelli and his Devil Doll Hugo.

I gave "Devil Doll" an unexpected 8/10. It plays like a feature-length episode of "The Twilight Zone", but in a good way. Yvonne Romain is a fair actress, and that's on top of being pin-up beautiful. Bryant Haliday is ridiculous as always as the Great Vorelli, but is slimy and creepy enough to evoke genuine discomfort. The story is crude but entertaining, and features enough plot twists to keep you interested. The end in particular is expertly done, but you'll have to watch for yourself to see what I mean. Watch it with friends and food, or watch it right now for free:













I also recommend:


























It has also come to my attention that there is a recent blacksploitation version of "Devil Doll" called "Black Devil Doll" (2009). Though I haven't seen it, it looks ridiculous. Here's a link to the amazon page for it:

Curse of the Voodoo (1965)

Directed by Lindsay Shonteff
Written by Brian Clemens and Leigh Vance

Rated PG for mild violence

"Curse of the Voodoo" is available to watch for free online here.

"Curse of the Voodoo" is one of the many classic b-films available to stream for free online at AMCTV.com. I was tempted to skip it because it looked horrible, but for the sake of thoroughness, I went ahead and watched it. Guess what? It didn't suck too bad! It's not a great film, but it was an enjoyably moody and moderately suspenseful voodoo thriller.

"Curse..." stars Bryant Halladay as Mike Stacey, an alcoholic colonial safari guide who splits his devotion between big-game hunting in Africa and endless bottles of whiskey, leaving no time for his estranged wife and son. The film starts in Africa, where Mike leads a big-game hunting trip that veers into Simbazi tribal land. Mike has killed many lions on hunting trips before, but never while in the territory of the Simbazi, who worship lions as gods. According to legend, anyone who kills a lion on Simbazi land will be cursed with death. Mike's companions warn him not to follow the lion into Simbazi territory, but being a staunch western cynic, Mike ignores the warnings, chasing a lion deep into Simbazi land and killing it.

Upon returning to the states, Mike spends most of his time at a night club that features African-American musicians and dancers. The film grinds to a halt for an impromptu dance performance by a curvy African dame. I'm all for some good booty-shakin', but this dance scene lasts at least five minutes and contributes absolutely nothing to the plot progression. While the African night club entertainers serve as a valuable commentary on how colonial societies co-opt native culture for their own use, five minutes of mad gyrating was completely unnecessary.

Mike's friend Major Lomas, who was also with him in Africa, encourages Mike to try to set things right with his wife, who moved (with their son) to her mother's while he was on his last safari. Mike visits his family, but it is clear that after years of playing second-fiddle to Mike's other pursuits, his wife Janet is sick of waiting for Mike to need her. He tries to make a date to meet at his hotel bar and discuss things further, but Janet stands him up.

Like the horrible person that he is, Mike goes home with the first floozie he finds. Unfortunately for her, he promptly passes out on her bed and has loud, screaming nightmares about the Simbazi.The next day, Mike is haunted by phantom Simbazi tribesmen who chase and torment him, but leave no evidence of having been there. He tries to reconcile with his wife, but ends up abandoning her to chase an imaginary tribesmen.

The Simbazi chase scenes are somber and surrealistic. They make this film very much a mood piece. Like the ghouls in one of my favorite cult horror films, "Carnival of Souls" (click link to watch "Carnival of Souls" for free at AMCTV.com), the phantom Simbazi tribesmen that haunt Mike Stacey in "Cult of the Voodoo" are more threatening and ominous than they are harmful. For some reason it is rather disquieting to see a man in a trench coat chased through a park in the London fog by loincloth-clad, spear-bearing African natives.

One of the most rewarding aspects of the film is the commentary on colonialism and the unethical misuse of other cultures. Mike Stacey is a good metaphor for western colonialism; a drunk, ambitious hunter who kills what he doesn't understand. The tribesmen then represent African culture, or rather the common western stereotypes of African culture; primal, mystical, untamed and dangerous. A somber voice-over at the beginning of the film tells us as much:

"Africa; where primitive tribes still practice evil religions which weave a dark web of death around all who sin against their gods."          -Narrator

At one point in the film, an African American scholar makes a reference to "the psychology of the guilt-ridden" when attempting to explain Mike's phantom illness. Given white man's long, abusive history with Africa (which includes, but is not limited to slavery) it makes sense that we have an innate sense of "white guilt". The phantom tribesmen that haunt Mike are like Freudian anxiety nightmare manifestations of Mike's white guilt.

I gave "Curse of the Voodoo" a 7/10. It's beautifully shot in black and white, and while the acting is often laughable, it is good enough to carry the plot. Some have complained that this film is racist, for which a case could definitely be made. I read it as an intelligent, fairly progressive, irony-laced dark satire on colonialism and white guilt. Watch it for free online right here:

If you liked "Curse of the Voodoo", here's another big cat/curse movie for a dark and stormy night: "Cat Girl". Click on the link to see my "Cat Girl" review and to watch "Cat Girl" online for free.













I also recommend:



























*****SPOILERS BELOW*****




I particularly enjoyed the way Mike Stacey lifts the "Curse of the Voodoo" by hitting the tribesman who'd cursed him with his Jeep. "Cat Girl" also featured a curse that was lifted by hitting something with a car. I guess modern engineering trumps ancient curses in most situations. This may be important to remember...